EXODIANS

Netizens of The Word

Sa Kambas ng Lipunan Revisited

Posted by darbs on August 2, 2009

“Kambas ng Lipunan” the second time around

On March 17, 2008, I blog this youtube video entitled “Sa Kambas ng Lipunan” -a  documentary of a Filipino painter with  his canvas, The Last Supper. The canvas as he described it,

Instead of the usual apostles clad in long clothes, I painted hungry kids covered with dirt; street scavengers…

2006-KambasngLipunan

Screenshot courtesy: Sa Kambas ng Lipunan

This should bring us to my personal experience as a street scavenger in the street of  New York City!.

Here we go.

One day  while I was walking on my way to work, I saw  a canvas in the sidewalk resting under the tree. Anybody could have picked it up because there was nothing wrong with the canvas. In fact, it was in a very good condition. I was in the right place and in the right time.

painting1

If you were a New Yorker, garbage is everyday occurrence. Household garbage was sometimes rotten and smelly lying in the sidewalk ready for pick-up and some were in good conditions while other needed repair just like the bike below.

Bike thrown away

bicycle left at the corner of the street ready for pick-up

The painting I saw under the tree was a little a bit odd. When I finally saw what the canvas was, my first question was  who in their right mind throw something like that? But, this is America, people throw things, they throw their garbage.

The canvas reminded me of my  religion/belief/tradition and of  the dream that went to the drain.

The canvas had reminded me once again of the saying,  “few are chosen” that is why I was OUT and they are In! and God has reasons why.

In fact, I willingly accepted long time ago the good old adage because if not, then my soul will go to HELL! hala ka diha!

But like doubting Thomas, I doubted too because my story was different. I WAS LITERALLY KICKED OUT  for the reason that I have no SPIRITUALITY! And of course the charge was coming from THE HIGHEST AUTHORITY IN THE LAND of the wonderland.

love-is-warPadre Damaso de Ispirilitsugas as we all know who evaluated my spirituality was the MOST ANNOINTED who had  strong spirituality without earthuality and very much known with his piousness – –  the most divine of the divines who later after three months as our GREATEST SPIRITUAL DIRECTOR OF all times became a bishop. Yes, He became a bishop of the Philippine Roman Catholic Church. Wow!

Who could defy him when he UTTERED THE WORDS, you have NO SPIRITUALITY! – – NO SPIRITUAL DIRECTION?  NOT EVEN ang BATICAN as evidence when he was ORDAINED AS BISHOP! COOL HA?

Yap, that’s how cool he was – – maybe he is… – – and will be.

Not only that I was kicked out from the seminary, I was kicked out (excommunicado) also from my own PRELATURE, now Diocese of somewhere. Hello Heswitics!

Where should I go? Don’t worry, and  I DON’T NEED you to PITY that young hard headed exsem. He is old now and just telling HIStory. Truth or not…Who cares it was long time ago.

2009: Better man

New Yorker 2009: The Better man - Lose Weight - Make Money - Have More Sex - HAH!

YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REPLY IF YOU WANTED TO. Please feel free  to pass by and comments. Hey, don’t worry it was long time ago. By the way where are the testimonials? Did you hide them properly inside the vatican archive? Please do… and protect them dearly so we will not embarrass each other because we all know the story behind the curtain.

Twenty-three years of hearing those words ringing in my head – day after day – night after night taunting me- no spirituality and no spiritual direction – – that ended my dream – –  lan-awon ta kung dili makubalan ang imong kasingkasing and don’t worry I made sure that I live with your FRIGGING EXPECTATIONS- – EXCOMMUNICATION? WHO CARES EITHER! I don’t wanna say bring it on! kay it was on already, remember?

the-new-yorkerAgain, PLEASE DON’T EVER PITY ON ME! Not a bit. I am alright. But If you did you should have done that 23 years ago, not now… NOT EVER!

A friend of mine suggested that I should convert myself  to other Religion. My answer is always be… I’d rather be a non-BELIEVER or an ATHEIST than GO TO OTHER religion. There is no third choice for me. Either a Roman Catholic or NO GOD nor No Religion at all. End of the story.

painting1 paint2
paint3 paint4

While taking these pictures, there was once again the question of defiance. Do I want to prove once more that I don’t really have a spirituality and add evidence to their collective decision was right -INFALLIBLE bs! – mga CLERICO PASISTA nga daan – – of course their decision was EXCELLENT – – the ROMAN CATHOLIC CHURCH SHOULD condone… FOREVER AND EVER AMEN. So help me God and forever put  shame to myself -AND – MYSELF ALONE! Pasangil? IPASANGIL TANAN SA AKOA MGA UNDOY! Pasanginli si buktot sa inyong sa inyong desisyon. I accept it!

In the seminary, if you were accused of no spirituality – – you are in a deep deep sh*t. Add this to your rectora nga wa makapangukoy, naglagot common1kay si BUKTOT ra man giod ang wa maukoy… puerting lagota kay ang tanang TIKBOY sa iyang katedral naumoy – APAN SI BUKTOT wa matandog, pero nahikapan hinoon kay kinahanglan gud ug pamasahi pauli so unsay gamiton? -ang bulawanong katahom…ug ang panguts – then that is a DISASTER. EMBRASSMENT? KATAW-AN SA UBANG RELIHIYON? come on! WE DID IT TO OURSELVES, why worry? WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF BLOGGING! WELCOME TO THE WORLD OF GERRY SPRINGER! WELCOME TO NEW YORK CITY! WELCOME TO THE BROADWAY SHOW!

I was late for work that day because I have to carry the painting back in the house thinking on how I prove to the world that I don’t really have a spirituality – – I need that proof.

Faith Retardation: To prove that I don’t really have a spirituality because I have to live with it. I DON’T WANT TO DISAPPOINT my former SPIRITUAL DIRECTOR WHO BECAME A bishop …then gladly the AHA MOMENT CAME! I sold THE PAINTING in EBAY! and there is your NO Spirituality, damn ass nga ispirilitsugas. (there! – your delicadeza! silingan ni Damasoy Wakalamoy!)

CONVINCE NOW? So that is the reason why, I am here and you are there. Thank you very much!

By the way, ispirilitsugas remember the priest who not sure what your story with him. But the way I perceived your story, that priest had no balls to confront you. Do you still remember the story about that priest you shared with your batos? (Apology for overhearing it…) I wonder where he is now. Hope he could read this blog and join the force ug matubuan sad ug itlog.

5 Responses to “Sa Kambas ng Lipunan Revisited”

  1. Roy said

    an ex-seminarian?

    I’ve been meeting ex-sem in the blogosphere lately, and I have lots of friends in the real world too.

    Though not really an ex-sem myself, I practically grew up inside the church, I was an ROTC (I’m sure you know what that means).

    As a child, I was a knight of the altar, I also sung in the choir and play the guitar during mass whenever the official guitarist is absent. As an adult, I became a SPEM.

    Of course, that won’t compare to being inside the seminary.

    What I want to say is that, while I was serving, I saw a lot of things which would make you want ‘out’ of the church. There more ‘sinners’ serving than there are ‘saints’ if you know what I mean.

    But they are not what I was there for. I came to serve God.

    I may not know the details, but I think I have an idea of what you went you through. And I really can’t heal whatever wound you’re carrying.

    I just want to share what I told an ex-sem friend before… “there are lots of ways we can serve God, it is not an excuse, but it’s the truth”

    I can feel how you want to serve, maybe there’s a different calling for you… and you can serve Him better there.

    I am glad you’re keeping the Catholic faith.

    sorry darbs, napahaba ang comment ko, ginanahan mag-english e🙂

    Right of Reply: Sir Roy, thank you very much. I understand exactly what you meant. hahaha. I know it is not funny but our society tolerated all these things to happen, as I said not until 2002 when the CODE OF SILENCE WAS CRACKED that my perspective changed. Salamat sa reflection. AMEN TO THAT SIR ROY!

  2. diaryofmiel said

    the more i read your entries the more i am quite enlightened of what’s behind the story… correct me if im wrong but you sound like you are still bitter over that incident which happened a few years ago. That I could not say more.

    Nobody can define you better if you are in really deep deep sh*t because you have no spirituality except you, it’s your choice to prove him (the bishop) that he was wrong or right after all.

    Yep, you’re on the right track… blog it… express it all in here🙂 Perhaps if you’re not yet totally healed with this issue, this might be the right place for it.

    God bless us all Darbs!

    • darbs said

      @Diaryofmiel – – exactly! they called it disgruntled exsem or disgruntled employee or plain whistle blower. Do you know what happened to a whistle blower in the Philippines? hahaha!

      Do you kow what happened if you exposed a scandal like ZBN-ZBT whatever transaction scandal?

      Bitterness? of course, naa bay disgruntled nga dili bitter. hahaha. NO, Just kidding. I AM IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA…what else should I do? Find a hobby…and this now my hobby…hahaha!

      Healed? hahaha! what is there to heal if MY CULTURE and the CIRCLE thought it was OK… nothing is wrong.. . pahikap lang gud pari bitaw na. hahaha….i was told that I was sinner/immoral/no spirituality…and I accepted them all. PARI BITAWANG GAINGON OK LANG! What is there to heal?

      The problem was ang mga KANAHAN NGA ROMAN CATHOLIC FAITHFULS IN AMERICA open up the PANDORA BOX and they said NO IT WAS NOT OK! They called those action — molestation – – ABUSE of power… they define the face of MOLESTATION… I SAW PRIESTS/CLERICS BEING HANDCUFFED – – IMPRISONED… now what?

      bitterness? yap I am bittered to this Catholic faithfuls who poisoned my mind…NOW I CAN RELATE THEIR EXPERIENCE to what I witnessed when the world was still young. LONG LONG TIME AGO. So here is the first letter to the world when I was awaken sa MALAKING KULOG. How the exodians.org came about.

  3. ive read the other article from ur archives ba to? i still have lots of questions pero mura this is not the right place to ask about it nor might be not good to ask about it…

    Right of Reply: hangtud lang ta sa istorya ini igsoon kay ang atung kaisog sa pag-istorya sa immoralidad not from the point of view sa mga katolikong Filipinong pangutok. Just imagine, it took me another six years aron makaistorya ta niining mga butanga. Wa ka ba kabalo nga mikurog ang akong kabukugan sa dihang gi send nako ang maong sulat niadtong 2003? Apan tungod sa kusog nga suporta sa mga Amerikanong Katoliko ug ang ilang example sa KADAUGAN NGA GIPANGPRESO UG GIPOSASAN ANG MGA KANAHANG immoral nga kaparian – – resign ang mga kaobispohan nga apil sa cover up — ug dinhi, milambo ang atong kaisog.

    Ang atong panglantaw nagsumikad sa Americanhong Catholic faithfuls nga DILI OKAY ANG mga pari nga mangukoy sa ilang mga tikboys. Ug bilib giod kaayo ka kay bisan pa man sa immoralidad sa ilang kaparian/kleriko nagpabilin gihapon sa pagtoo nga pagkakatoliko kay ang balaod gipatuman gayod ug dinhi nimo makita ang KABAG-OHAN. Gihatag kini sa AMERIKANHONG ROMANO KATOLIKO NGA SIMBAHAN.

    Ma feel nimo niining lugara ang HUSTISYA UG KAANGAYAN apan ang KURAP nga Pilipinhong sistema dili haom nining mga butanga especially nga ang Pilipinas way ngipon sa pagprosecute SA IMORALIDAD SA PANGUKOY SA MGA TIKBOYS.

    NGANO? kay MAHADLOK NGA KATAW-AN SA UBANG PAGTOO!. MAHADLOK NGA KATAW-AN SA UBANG RELIHIYON! KAY KUNO MAY KONSPAYRASI NGA HUGNOON ANG SIMBAHANG KATOLIKO! MGA BALINGAG NGA PANGHUNA-HUNA! Kinsa ang makahugno sa SIMBAHANG KATOLIKO? HAHAHA! PAGKATAGABUKID NGA PANGHUNAHUNA! WA MO KUYAPI? Conspiracy, gigamit aron pahilomon sa dayon. Ug dinhi kita mihilom. Mao na kabalingag ang pangutok nga Pilipinhon! Ana ang atong KULTURA NAHIGOT nga tanan MAPASAYLO BASTA PARI KA OG OBISPO.

    Kay sa pagkatinuod kung ang nahitabo niadtong unang panahon gihatagan ug value anaa na unta imbestigasyon ug prosecution UG kanahan GITANGGONG NA UNTA SA PRISOHAN. PERO KAY PILIPINAS…SAGDI NA LANG TIGUWANG NA BITAW.

    Kay kung dinhi sa Amerika nahitabo ang salaod sa pagpangukoy SA MGA TIKBOYS – PRISO NA UNTA KARON – – sus, kabalo tawon tanan oi. apil na ang mga kaubanang kaparian ug mga kaobispohan. Harap-harapan ug garapalan ang nahitabo – – kabalo tanan kung kinsa ang mga tikboys nga gipangukoy – – GUESS WHAT? Naa bay resulta? may reporma ba?

    What if I AM not here in the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA? What if NOBODY TOLD ME THAT IT WAS NOT OKAY? WHAT IF NAA KO NAGPUYO NIANANG kurap nga sistema nga ang mga TIKASAN, KAWATAN UG HUMAN RIGHTS VIOLATORS padayon sa inadlaw nga panginabuhi?
    WHAT IF NAA KO gapuyo sa kultura NGA MOHILOM na lang KAY SIMBAHAN BITAW NA – – PASAYLOON MAN NA SYA SA GINOO? WHAT IF THERE IS NO INTERNET? WHAT IF THERE IS NO BLOGGING? what if there was no 2002? What if priests molesters here in America were not put to prison? What if gamata lang ta ug MORNING? What if there were no CATHOLIC FAITHFULS WHO ASKED FOR REFORM?

    HEY, it took me another SIX YEARS before mahisgutan ug makaistorya ta pag-usab niining mga butang ug dili sayon ang preparasyon. In the ground, I have to ally myself sa mga AMERIKANHONG KATOLIKO ug gihulat giod nako nga MAHIMO KONG AMERICAN CITIZEN aron may proteksyon sa AMERIKANHONG BALAOD – – dinha kinsa ang mo-protekta sa imoha? So hangtud lang ta sa istorya.

    Pirma: Darbs

  4. dFish said

    Wow! Parang 99 Theses ni Luther, posted on the wall of the blogosphere. Payts Darbs…Friend kong formator na ngayon, pilit pinapalabas nung Scholastic pa kami kasi wala daw talaga syang bokasyon.Madalas sila nag bo boxing pagdating ng SD. Persistent sya na meron sya kaya resistance worked on his side. Diabetic kasi yung rector namin na yun eh kaya di namin tuloy malaman kung kulang lang sa insulin or what ang mga mandatum…

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